- Who Am I?
- What Have I Done?
- How to Party: Hero Style!
- Review: Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
- Review: The Matrix Online
- Review: Rag Doll Kung Fu
- Review: Day of Defeat: Source
- Review: Battlefield 2
- Review: Darwinia
- Review: The Matrix: Path of Neo
- Review: Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones
- Hardware Review: XBox 360 Controller for Windows
- Review: Tomb Raider: Legend
- Review: Sin Episodes: Emergence
- Review: Half Life 2: Episode One
- Review: The Ship
- Interview: Chris Peck (OuterLight)
- Review: Prey
- Review: Broken Sword 4 – The Angel Of Death
- Review: DEFCON
- Long Play – StarTopia
- Modus Operandi
- Review: Rock Legend
- Review: Audiosurf
- Review: World of Goo
- Review: Burnout Paradise – The Ultimate Box
- Malevolent Effect
- Left 4 Sims
Review: The Ship
This is probably the review I’m most proud of so far, mainly as I try something a little different, and actually manage to pull it off rather well, I feel.
It was a dark night, and the seas had so far on the journey been as harsh as any sea could have been. Although tonight the waves had grown to an eeire calm, making tonight seem rather onimous. Sheer-luck Holmes and his sidekick Wattsun had gathered the suspects in the library of the magnificent cruise liner. The group that had gathered were all very nervous and eyed each other suspiciously, each of them looking for a sign of weakness within the other. They waited with great anticipation as Holmes, arched over the fireplace with a Brandy in hand took a sharp breath.
“I have brought you here tonight,” began Holmes, “to reveal the circumstances of Mr Jones’ murder. As you know, his case was a most unusual one, in that the victim was found with a syringe deeply embedded into his back while travelling on this very luxury cruise.” The guests nodded, they knew this information too well. “But how, perchance, did he come to be on the liner?” asked Wattsun, “Well you see,” started Holmes “like everyone else they recieved a letter from a ‘Mr X’ to begin with, who invited them onto of six ships. Most of these ships were based on ‘famous’ fictional ships of classic detective stories, all with a 1920’s theme. All these ships had oodles of character dripping from every corner, and were great fun to navigate around, and no two ships had quite the same layout. Apparently, they all used something called a Source Engine to good effect, even if it didn’t yet use the new fangled “HDR” technology – and the stylised look gave The Ship a great ‘personality’ – and every ship managed to have a slighty different feel. Most ships even had areas that were normally off limits to the passengers, but a sneaky fellow could and often was reported to sneak in to grab whatever goodies lay inside.
“But, Detective, if these were all based on 1920’s themed ships, why were there Security cameras on board?”
“Well, you see my dear, they were only replica cruise liners, and had all the mod cons such as secruity cameras, vending machines, ATMs and the like. And these items server a purpose. Because Mr X’s invitation wasn’t about a nice lesuirely cruise you see.” The guests ears pricked up at this point. “You see, Mr X had actually kidnapped Mr Jones’ family, and threatened to kill them if Jones did perform a certain..task for him. You see, Mr Jones was forced to murder a fellow passenger.” The women gasped, the men were taken aback and all ears were now fiercly intent on the the words coming out of Holmes’ mouth. “And not only that, but someone else had his name, someone in this very room, and they in turn had to kill him.”
“So,” piped up Wattsun, “he had to kill someone without being killed?” “Precisely, my good friend. However, he couldn’t let the crew see him commit his murder nor could they see him in possesion of an offensive weapon, lest he be fined and taken to the jail on every ship. And with the numerous Guards, shop assistants and other NPC’s, it wasn’t plain sailing, if you excuse the pun, to make his killing.” The other guests nodded in agreement, but they couldn’t help thinking about the many dark and secluded areas on every Ship, and the thought of how a sneaky killer could use these to his full advantage played on everyone’s mind. “However, sooner or later Jones did what any other normal human being would do. He could have got hungry and needed to goto the restaurant for some food, he could have been getting tired and needed to take a rest” Wattsun interjected “but then, perhaps that’s when he could have made an easy kill?” “Ah yes, but he was smart, rather than sleep in his cabin, he took a crafty nap on a chair in a public place. He knew as well as anyone that if he was in a public area, it was harder for his killer to catch him. The addition of changeable clothing, hats and glasses only added to the confusion og how the killer looked, but it also helped Mr Jones elude his killer for a little while longer.
“His downfall came when he took a trip to the toilet. That’s when his killer sneaked in behind him and dispatched the poor bugger as he relieved himself. Obviously the effects of the content of the syringe took some time to kick in, but his assliant made a quick getaway.” The gathered crowed were now in awed silence, Holms was surely a brilliant man. He turned back to the fireplace and carried on his tale. “You see, the assiliant could have used one of a number of weapons, including swords, guns, knives. He could have even had the gall to steal a frying pan from the kitchen, a golf club from a bag or even a prosthetic arm found in one of the many containers on the ship. He even ahd the chance to cause an accident, after all there were so many waiting to happen, such as the loose chandileer, or the not-so securely attached lifeboats. All of which would have been fun to use for a killer, and always fills a hunters mind with glee the first time they use such exotic methods of killing. However, the killer slipped up when I found a list of weapons, along with monetary values written next to them. It seemed the more exotic the weapon used, the more money the killer recieved from Mr X”
“This all sounds very complicated” piped up the most elderly of the group from the back. “Indeed sir, it does sound that way, but once they got hang of it they found it a lot of fun, the visuals met the style of the game well, the interface is pretty self explanatory and there are numerous hints to help you play throughout the game, giving useful killing tips and ways of ensuring your own survival. In addition, the NPCs make the game a little more unpredictable, thanks to the ‘regular passengers tied in with the hunters and killers, and there was talk amongst some of the hunters that there were four different gamemodes for the hunters and hunted to participate in, including classic deathmath, if that was their thing.” The guests were a little confused by this part, as they were sure they were here to hear how a mystery had been solved, and these terms meant nothing to them. “The only real downpoints would be that the current Singleplayer mode is a little lacking – although there are talks of a “Story mode” to come a later time with the retail release (and using some sort of STEAM power for a cost) and the NPC’s are fairly obvious, but overall The Ship is a great deal of fun no matter who you’re playing with – and idiots are even discoruaged from ruining games thanks to an inbuilt punishment system – and is a hearty reccomendation. Good work on the team from Outerlight. The Ship’s combination injects some freshness into the aging multiplayer FPS genre, and the game is a unique, fun experience and I implore anyone to try it at least once. Hopefully OL will release some sort of demo before too long.”
The room went silent, Holmes laughed to himself, he had indeed cracked a great case, and surely the crowd would now be standing in awe of his amazing skills. He turned around, and noticed that the entire crowd, whom he assumed had been listening silently to his every wod, were now dead on the floor. Only Wattsun remained, and he held both his hands behind his back. “What happened here Wattsun?”
The last thing Sheer-luck saw was a frying pan heading towards his face.
And so ends the tale of Sheer-Luck Holmes and The Case of The Elaborate Review.
Final Score: 87%